Following primitive and instinctive actions is a horrible and foolish thing to do, like sticking one's hand in the dark. 
We are supposed to have intelligence and reason, but in the face of desire it is very weak, and we will often be unable to keep our beliefs and decisions.
You know it, but you can't stop, and you do it again when you meant to do it for the last time.

What awaits you is the end of something.
We should not be fooled by the illusion that there is beauty in the ephemeral, in the waning of the moment.